Finding the Answer

I dreamed about it
Fought for it
with full throttle
until I won the battle
Then started living my dream
Thought it will be as sweet as cream
But as I went along
Realized I was so wrong
Everything just turned out to be bitter
n my eyes lost all of its glitter
I don't understand why 
The only thing I do now is cry

This is all I ever wanted
Something I dreamt and chased
But now that I'm here
I feel like I'm no where
Lost.. gone.. dead
Why is this happening?
Why all this questioning?
I'm afraid I can't find an answer
I guess I have to live with this forvever





PS - Not exactly my emotions 

Crazy Love --> Scary love

I'm sitting on a wall
I see a gal
My heart go jill-jill
In love i fall
;)

I ask her to be my bul-bul
Say in my heart love full
For u I climb a hill
Or a bullock cart i pull
Take u to shopping mall
We can go to cinema hall
Will pay all your bill
But she say in her heart love nil..
:(
I say I jump in a well
Or take sleeping pill
For u myself i kill
But please "No" don't tell
-/\-
She said I not tall
Looking like a ball
Treated me like a quill
And said go to hell
:@
I full badly feel
Said at me don't yell
I will never again call
On your china cell
Don't act like a doll
U look like chicken on grill
so just chill...!!!
B)